Kristyna Baczynski

You’ve spent the past three years alone on a desert island. You build a raft and miraculously hit the mainland right in front of a Circle K. What’s the first thing into your mouth when you burst through its doors?

Oreos by the handful. In this case, mini Oreos to prevent choking.

You’re the last survivor of avalanche that has trapped your party for a number of weeks. You may or may not have developed a taste for human flesh by the time you make it to the nearest supermarket. Which snack will welcome you home best?

I’d chew through my own arm for a peanut butter and marshmallow spread sandwich.

You’ve just been released after forty years of wrongful imprisonment. In recompense, the Governor has offered you a lifetime supply of your favorite snack. What morsel will make everything alright?

Giant peruvian corn, salted to the nines.

You awake from a seven-year coma with a jolt. You sit straight up in your bed, and scream the name of the snack that you’ve been dreaming of all this time. What reveals itself at the top of your lungs?

Potato and onion dumplings – Ukrainian Varenyky. I have screamed (and indeed dreamed) about these for many years, comas aside.

You’ve been hiding out in the Russia from the U.S. Government for years now. You’re tired of borscht. What snack might you face charges of treason for?

Sweet potato wedges and a bourgeois array of dips. Well worth risking a trip to the gulag for.